Do you ever feel like you don’t have anymore ideas? As in you want do something, but you don’t know what to do? Do you ever feel stuck? You see, this happens to me all the time. I’ll come up with some great ideas, I’ll make some plans for my goals then all of a sudden I’m stuck. I’m stuck in a place where I don’t know what to do about my goals. Most of the time I feel like it’s because I’m not asking the questions I should be asking or I’m not putting as much effort into like I should. But, when times like this happen I’ll take a moment and reflect. I love to reflect on the things I have done, not only to remember how far I have came, but also because they help me realize that I can do so much more. You see, I realize that being stuck is a good thing because it gives you time to resupply, refuel, and get back at it again much harder, and much stronger than before. I learned that in order to earn more out of yourself, you must continue to learn more. I have witnessed that if you stop learning, you will stop growing, and therefore you will continue on doing things that will get you nowhere. So, I say too you, if you feel stuck, if you feel as if you aren’t getting anywhere. I ask you to press on. I ask you to ask questions and take action for the things that you are scared to do. Because in order to get yourself out of the hole you are in, you must start on the path of digging yourself out of it.
Jealousy is one of the worst traits that we have as humans beings. I know for me at times I have been jealous. Whether it was of someone’s achievements, someone else’s looks, the way someone else performed, the attention someone else received over me, and many more. To be honest seeing someone else achieve something that I didn’t made me feel like I couldn’t do shit. It made me feel like I wouldn’t even come as close to achieving what they did. You see, jealously caused me to have strong dislike for certain people and the crazy thing is they didn’t even do anything to me. Like, how do you dislike someone or something when they didn’t even do anything to you or they don’t even know you? But, as time went on I learned a few things. 1) Jealousy is something that kills dreams and goals, and it’s all because you are too busy worrying about what someone else has going on rather than what you have going on. 2) Jealousy is self-hate and self-doubt that you’ve hidden inside of yourself and once someone achieve something that you didn’t, that’s when it begins to rise up to the surface causing you to become hateful and envious towards that individual. And 3) Jealousy is an act that can be cured by accepting the fact that even though you didn’t achieve what someone else has now, that doesn’t mean that you won’t achieve it in the future. So, I ask you to be happy, be happy for others and their achievements, be happy that someone made it. Yes, your time might not have came yet but I promise you it will. You must keep going for it until you receive what you have been waiting for.
I’m motivated by more than what the future has for me. I’m motivated by more than just the present. But, all in all, I’m motivated more by the past experiences that I’ve had. I’m motivated by the struggles and hardships that I have faced. I’m motivated by the long hours I’ve stayed up looking for a way out. I’m motivated by the actions I have taken to reach my goals. I’m motivated by those people who told me I wouldn’t achieve the things I said I was going to achieve. But most of all, I’m motivated by the person I used to be. A person who cared what others had to say, a person who tried his hardest just to please other people, and a person who would spend time helping others improve themselves, but wouldn’t take the time to do the same for himself. So to my past self and experiences, I say thank you. Thank you for motivating me, so that I could realize that it’s only up from here and that I have become someone who has more to offer and I’m just getting started.
What do I see? I see a man who has given his all to a woman who may never love him the same way that he loves her. I see a woman/mother alone who hustles and fights for the survival of herself as well as her children. I see a house built, but destroyed by the chaos that lives within it. I see a child lost and confused with the adversities that goes on around her. But, even within all of these things that I see. I still choose to follow the light in the mist of the darkness that guides me and let’s me know that everything will be ok. Because, I also see a firework that makes a person smile the brightest even if it’s only for a few seconds. I see parents filled with with joy after the birth of their new born baby. I see hearts repaired with roses at the arrival of a new love. Because even through all the hardships I have seen, I still see the rainbow that appears after a storm has vanished.
We search even on our darkest days, we search. When the pieces seem to scatter away, we search. When the mountains seem too high to climb, we search. When the tears fall down our eyes, we search. When the love seems lost, we search. Through hell and heaven, we search. Whether day or night, we search. Full of fear and fright, we search. Lost within one’s self, we search. We search why? Because we are curious for what is out there. We search to find the answer that’s missing within the cracks. We search to look for purpose within the stories untold. We search because we are seekers, searching for answers to the questions unknown.
Managing your day can be easy but it also takes a lot of work. You see, if you are someone who works a 9-5, but is also trying to follow your dreams it can sometimes be hard to find a set time for everything. You see, since being in the navy I not only learned how to focus on my job in the navy, but I also learned how to focus on what I want to do when I leave the navy. You see, I believe that if you want something you’ll put in the time and effort for it, but if you don’t you’ll just make a excuse for it. You have to think of it like this, there are twenty-four hours in a day. Now, yes you work a 9-5, so you may think that takes up most of your day. But here’s the thing, that’s only eight hours you have spent, which means you have sixteen hours left of that day to work on things you haven’t had a chance to reach yet. Now, this doesn’t mean that you have to cut off spending time with your friends and family it just means you have to manage your time wisely if you want to accomplish so many things in one day. You must remember that time doesn’t wait or stop for anyone so use it wisely. Also remember DON’T SPEND MOST OF YOUR TIME WORKING FOR SOMEONE ELSE THAT YOU FORGET TO DO THE SAME FOR YOURSELF. We have to learn that in order to take care of someone else, we must first take care of ourselves. So, remember to use your time wisely because you’ll never get it back. You just have to do your best with with the time you have.
Writing is beautiful, writing is a life changer, and writing is what helps me identify myself and the world around me. Starting off, I began writing to release everything off my mind. At the time, I had so much going on. My cousin who was like an older brother to me was killed and I couldn’t go to the funeral since I was on deployment at the time. My little brother was getting ready to graduate high school and I couldn’t even make it. Like he was there for mine and I couldn’t even be there for his graduation because I was out at sea. And lastly my family was beginning to fall apart and I couldn’t even do anything about it because I wasn’t there to help with the missing pieces. You see, I lost myself for a bit, my vision seemed blurry because I was at a point where I didn’t know what the hell I wanted to do with my life. But the beauty in writing is that not only did I find something to help me relieve myself of everything trapped inside my mind. But I also fell in love with something that changed my mindset and my life forever. Because that beautiful, but yet scary thing got me sharing my story, writing my pain and progress, and delivering a message from the bottom of my heart. Was something I never could imagine when I was younger and that was writing.
STOP using the same excuses for why you aren’t where you are want to be. I’ve heard people say things like, “oh it’s because of my color, oh it’s because of my skin, or oh it’s because I’m a male or female”. Listen if you want to accomplish your own definition of success. Then you must quit with the whole blaming it on your color, religion, or gender. There are plenty of people who are the same color, has the same religion, and are gender as you and they still achieved their very own definition of success. Reason being is because they refuse to allow for their color, religion, and gender to stop them from achieving something that they have always wanted. So why should you? Why should you allow for your color, religion, and gender to stop you from achieving something that at the end of the day is personal to you? It doesn’t belong to anyone else but you and if you have to go through hell and high water to achieve it then so be it. But you will not, I repeat, YOU WILL NOT blame it on your color, gender, or religion for why you aren’t where you want to be at in life. That is something entirely up to you so don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.
If you are reading this, may you have the courage and the strength to take on whatever life throws your way. May you be brave even when you are afraid, may you have faith even we all seems lost, and may you stand up for what you believe in.
You must be consistent with growing your mind and perfecting your craft, especially if you want to succeed. Your definition of success may be different from someone else’s, but whatever it may be you must be consistent in it. The daily habits you do everyday is what keeps you consistent.