Damaged Emotions

You may know someone who is controlled by their emotions but you also may be that someone. To be honest I’m that someone. I’m that someone, who has experienced some things to where my emotions at times get the best of me. Whether it’s by me not trusting someone, not loving someone as much, or simply not listening to someone. You see, I believe it wasn’t always like this. I believe it’s something that occurs over time. Now, I do believe that you can get better at controlling your emotions but it’s going to take time. It will take time for you to be able to love someone again, it will take time for you to be able to trust someone again, and it will take time for you to start listening to others again. Now, you may ask, how do I recognize when my emotions are controlling me? And I would say it’s simply by asking someone. I have learned that the people who you surround yourself around the most are usually the ones who know this answer. Can’t explain how many times my friends or family have told me that I allow my emotions to get the best of me at times. Now I am getting better, but it’s by learning to not take everything personal. I feel like this is a good trait to learn because every emotion you have inside of you is something that can be let out by something or someone. It could be a name that reminds you of the death of a loved one that triggers it, or a place that reminds you of someone you use to know, or a phrase that someone close to you use to always say. But, the best tool for me to start repairing these damaged emotions is by simply learning to not take everything personal. By doing this, I have been able to heal myself and be able to control my emotions that were so easy to let out at times. I came to a conclusion that if I wanted peace in my heart, I must first be willing to control the emotions surrounded around it. I also realized that I wanted to live a fulfilled life, but I wouldn’t be able to do that if I allowed my emotions to control my actions. So, I say too you, find out what is it that allows you to react so easily, find out how you can control it. Because once you are able to control your emotions, you are able to control yourself.

Questionable People

Jesus, Martin Luther King Jr., Mahatma Gandhi, and John F. Kennedy all have one thing in common. They all wanted change not only in people but for world. You see, I have learned that if you’re someone who questions their surroundings you are seen as a threat in the eyes of other’s, therefore they will do whatever they have to do to get rid of you. You see, people fear change, they fear what they can’t control. They fear it because they themselves don’t want to change, they want for things to stay the same, and they don’t want to worry about certain circumstances. But yet, many people fail to realize that we are bound to change, we are bound to grow. Some people spend their whole life trying to kill the idea of change rather than embracing it. And at the end of the day all it does is backfire on them. For example, when Jesus died for our sins people failed to realize that yes he sacrificed his life for us, but he did it so that we could change. The same with Martin Luther King Jr. he was assassinated because he believed in bringing every race, gender, etc all together. Gandhi was assassinated as well for trying to reunite India. And lastly, JFK was assassinated for trying to end segregation. But here’s the kicker, even though all of them died their ideas didn’t die with them. Because of JFK and Martin Luther King Jr. segregation ended, because of Gandhi India is now free of Great Britain, and because of Jesus every sin around the world was forgiven. So you see, it doesn’t matter what evil comes our way because it can destroy all it wants, but it shall never conquer us. So I ask you to remember that you are a threat, you are a threat because of what you believe in and what you stand for. But I ask you to not be afraid, I ask you to continue on, and I ask you to constantly question your surroundings. Because at the end of the day you are not in this fight alone. I rather see you hated for something you loved, than loved for something you hate.

Beauty in the riches

I have mix feelings about money. You see, money is something that, too me, can be a good thing or a bad thing but it all depends on the situation. I have seen the hardships of money, whether it was having to move from house to house all because we couldn’t pay the bills on time or having to worry about the lights and water being cut off. All my life money has been something that I wanted so bad. Not because I wanted to be rich, but mainly so myself and my family wouldn’t have to worry about anything. You see, you have your struggles whether you are rich or poor but I preferred to be rich while going through the struggle. Even though now I’m in the navy and I’m far from home money is something I still worry about. Yeah, I’m single, no kids so I have no one to spend the money on right? Wrong you see since I left home I have poured all of my money into my dreams. I figured if I could sacrifice the time I’m away from home then it wouldn’t take me that long to achieve certain goals of mine. But it gets hard, it gets hard because you want to help out so bad at home but you realize that you have dreams you want to follow, so the only thing you can do is pray for your family and keep pressing on. You see, the one thing that keeps my head up is that yes I have seen the ugly when it comes to the money, which means the beauty in it is on the way. I just have to stay focus on my dreams and constantly work on getting better each and everyday. So I say this, yes money has it’s problems but I truly believe the problems are worth it. It’s all worth it because once you receive it, you’ll be able to do greats things with it. It just starts with the question what are you willing to do without it in order to receive it?

What Are You Willing To Do

What are you willing to do for your dreams? I have seen how much a mother is willing to do for her kids. You see, my father wasn’t in me and my brothers lives growing up so my mom had to take on that role. But instead of trying to fill that role with another man right away, she took it upon herself and started working her ass off everyday for my brothers and I. Whether she worked two, three, or four jobs it didn’t matter. The point was she was going to do whatever it took for her kids to not worry about a damn thing. Which brings me back to the question because I have seen how much a mother is willing to do for her kids, but how much will YOU be willing to do for your dreams? Believe me you are going to experience some sleepless nights. I can’t tell you how many times I have seen my mom all tired out from a days work, but still she kept pressing on. So are you willing to do the same, are you willing to be hopeless at times and not see a way out, are you willing to sacrifice time with family and friends, and are you willing to stay consistent on something even if it’s take forever to achieve? Because my mother, even though she worked so much, she had dreams too. And she achieved those dreams while working multiply jobs and having three boys to take care of. But it took a lot of strength for her to do it. So I ask you again, what are you willing to do for your dreams?